Rugby
Flats Blog: Big Trees Fall Hard
In the words of my beloved wife: "Your biggest problem is that you think you look ok. You don't." These aggressive sentiments were seemingly echoed by former England Sevens captain Rob Vickerman as I spoke positively about my fitness levels ahead of his day of testing.
We started off quite nicely, banging and clanging on the squat rack - a place where I feel reasonably comfortable. Then we leapt like startled fleas into the air and my standing jump score - despite my admittedly gargantuan heft - stunned Vickerman almost to silence. I was declared elite. Well, not actually out loud, but I knew I was confounding expectation.
Your biggest problem is that you think you look ok. You don't.
Mrs F
Then we sprinted. Well, I tried to sprint. My brain was telling my body to explode, but my body seemed to refuse. Vickerman didn't quite manage to disguise his coach's grin as I rumbled past him, all apuff with veins bulging. It turns out that I am less rapid when at full chat than an arthritic sea turtle. Hmm, not good.
Way better, though, than the anaerobic shuttle test that rounded off a glorious day of physical exertion. I did this test a few times as a player, and it broke me every time. Every, single time. Yet still I remained confident. This confidence lasted roughly 44 seconds. Soon enough I was battling to put one foot in front of the other, oxygen had gone, all clarity of thought and purpose had dissolved.
My rest periods didn't exist as I repeatedly trundled back over the start/finish line too late. So I just kept going. Truly, I think Vickerman could have walked it quicker.
So I am making some changes. It won't all happen instantly, but I'll get there. Healthier food - and less of it - more exercise that isn't heavy weightlifting, and less chocolate brownies with my afternoon espresso.
Big tree fall hard.
You can find out how hard by following my journey to elite Sevens fitness @DHLRugby.
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